Online dating web sites constitute a billion dollar industry, and the big sites – Match.com, eHarmony, and others – will tell you that they possess secret algorithms that increases your odds of finding the right person. But now a large study published by the Association for Psychological Science reveals what’s really happening. Among their findings: 1. Dating sites give you greater access to more potential partners, but the act of browsing and comparing large numbers of profiles can create a mindset of commoditizing potential partners and reduce the willingness to commit to any one person. 2. Communicating online works well in the short run, […]
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You are in love with the guy you believe is “the one.” Everything seems to be going great, when suddenly, he backs off. He gives you some kind of lame excuse, or he gives you no excuse, but he doesn’t give you a valid reason. You have nothing to work with, and you realized that you have been abandoned. It is a devastating feeling. Why does this happen? What are the signposts that may tell you when the guy you are dating could be the guy who exits abruptly? Most importantly, what can you do, and how can you respond? […]
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Dear Nina: I just read Internet Dating for the Savvy Single – AWESOME. Packed with common sense dating advice. I am trying to get back to dating but I am having trouble getting over my last relationship. We met on a dating site and instantly clicked – rare. We had an eight month relationship which was fantastic. I got a STD test and found out I have HSV-1. Asymptomatic – I have NEVER in my life had a cold sore so I was shocked by the results. Needless to say my girlfriend told me that the HSV-1 was a deal-breaker. I […]
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Download Internet Dating for the Savvy Single for the low price of $0.99. Summer is wedding season and millions of happy brides are finalizing details for their special day. How did these women meet that special guy who popped the question and put a ring on it? It may surprise you to know that one out of five of these couples met on the internet! Internet dating is now approaching one billion dollars in annual revenue. As I’m writing this, tens of thousands of couples who met on the internet are deciding to marry! If you don’t know someone who is happily married […]
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Have you ever loved someone who could not or would not move forward and make a real commitment? Did you ever find yourself in the position of holding onto someone who caused you more pain than happiness? Do your friends tell you that you are settling? Do you know what it feels like to believe that the person you love is the ONLY person you could ever love that much, so that you have no objectivity, no ability to choose in or choose out? Do you talk endlessly to your friends and family about all the problems in your relationship, re-hashing […]
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Dear Nina: I am a 40-something male who has never married or been in a committed relationship. When I ask why all my friends married and I didn’t, all I can think of is that in some sense, I never learned how to pursue a woman. I’m used to being a loner. The desire is there to have a soulmate, but I’m not in the situations to meet attractive, available people and I fear I didn’t learn the skills or get the experiences I should have gotten 20+ years earlier. But I’m turned off by overly aggressive women who come […]
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Why do we choose the people that we do? Sure, there’s physical attraction, but it turns out there are other factors at play when we act the crazy way we do in the name of love. Politics and religion have more to do with it than you may realize, even if you don’t talk about it! Find out all the fascinating science behind love and mate selection. Also in this Love Strategies show, find out what you need to know to make it more likely that love the second time around can actually work. Divorce and remarriage isn’t so easy, […]
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Dear Nina: I listen to your podcasts and I have read and refer back to Temptations of the Single Girl quite a bit! I became acquainted with a man at my new gym. He happened to be an employee there, selected to evaluate me for a personal fitness consultation. However instead of asking me questions pertaining to my health and fitness I was being interrogated with questions about my relationship status, my career/life choices, and travels. Felt like a date. Long story short I could feel an instant attraction and I could feel it was mutual. Upon returning for another personal training […]
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Remember the bizarre meltdown of Congressman Weiner? The story is old but it ties into the debate about monogamy: What is happening to monogamy? If you pay attention to the media, you might begin to conclude that is is an antiquated notion that no longer applies to today’s modern relationships. In this podcast, Nina tackles the issue of monogamy: why it is so important and what it has to do with today’s relationships. Also: is sexting cheating? Are emails of a sexual nature to someone outside of your relationship a sign that you’re cheating? Nina covers all these issues and […]
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Saturday at the beauty salon where I get my hair done, everyone was buzzing about the bestselling erotic fantasy novel Fifty Shades of Grey. My stylist, eyes glowing, told me I just had to read it. It seems that some of the women in the shop were getting a little marital lift out of Fifty Shades. One customer reportedly had “attacked her husband twice” the week that she read the book. So I gamely downloaded it and did my “research,” and it is truly a page-turning erotic journey. Since the book seems to be such a phenomenon, I wondered about […]
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What is “free love” and how does it affect today’s relationships? If you are over the age of 45, you already have some concept, but whether you do or not, the 1960’s notion of “free love” has a huge impact on relationships today. Your life has already been impacted by this historical phenomenon, and you may want to know how, especially for women. It’s not what you think, and in this enlightening podcast Nina shreds old notions about this familiar concept. Find out what real love really is, how two people can create it together, and why it is so much […]
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New studies highlight a so-called new trend: Stayover Relationships. The question raised by these studies is this: “Do stayover relationships interfere with the path to marriage?” But is this really a new trend, and does it really impact the decision to marry? Couples have been “staying over” for decades – meaning that they maintain separate homes but spend three or more nights per week at one place or the other. Find out from Nina why staying over might not be a bad idea, and also what to watch out for if your relationship follows this trend. Also in this podcast, […]
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“Love at first sight” is a well-known expression, but how real is it? I’ve heard many couples over the years refer to how quickly they fell in love. Some say it was instantaneous, others say it took weeks or months. You have probably heard more than one friend say “it was love at first sight”! The latest research tells us that it is possible to fall in love in as little as a fraction of a second. But the reality is that it doesn’t always lead to lasting love. One study, conducted by Syracuse University Professor Stephanie Ortigue, revealed that up to twelve areas […]
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“Love at first sight” is a familiar notion, but is it real? More importantly, can it last? Now, new research answers the question of whether or not those couples who instantly fall madly in love make it over the long haul. What causes instantaneous love? Is it real love? Why is it so difficult for crazy in love couples to take their time before marrying? In this podcast, Nina answers all those questions and more. Also in this podcast: how to effectively deal with the lying about age, height, and weight that you may encounter in the online dating world. Also, living together and money: […]
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Is your girlfriend pressuring you to get married? Maybe it’s time to listen because she’s right – getting married is good for you! Everyday Health reports the latest research on men’s health and the findings are in – men are healthier along every major dimension when they marry. From sex to cancer to heart problems, married men fare better. Married service men have lower rates of PTSD. Married men live longer, behave better, and drink less. For the full run-down, read the article in Everyday Health: “7 Ways Marriage Helps Men’s Health.” Of course, the obvious caveat is that when […]
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Despite the reality show staged scenarios, there are some nuggets of wisdom to be found in “The Bachelor,” ABC’s long running series that features one very handome guy dating about fifteen women at one time. Over the course of the season he gradually eliminates them until he has one woman to whom he proposes in a romantic scene complete with fabulous diamond ring. In real life, guys don’t date that way, but they could, at least to some degree. Looking at the Bachelor, a smart guy can take a few cues that will help him date more successfully. Find out what to […]
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Who is the “wounded guy” and why is it so tempting to date him? You may recognize this guy – he’s charming, he’s wild about you, and dating him is initially romantic beyond your wildest dreams. But something happens along the way with this guy that doesn’t add up to a loving, committed relationship in the long run. Why are you so wildly attracted to him? Why are you so tempted, and how can you side-step this devastating temptation? Find out now how to spot the wounded guy and move on to someone healthy. Click on the arrow below to […]
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Tina Marie Jones, Voice America Radio Host Extraordinaire, interviews Nina in this candid discussion about what happens when women give away their power in a relationship. Listen in as Tina Marie and Nina examine the top three myths that keep women stuck in a cycle of relationships that are unloving and unsafe. Find out what you can do as a woman to begin a new relationship on the right path, or correct the path of your current relationship. To find out more about Tina Marie and to access her radio show and other offerings, visit her website. Click on the […]
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Dear Nina: I recently started dating a new guy who I met online – we are both in our early thirties. We went out on dates for about a month. Then, we had a couple of dates at our homes and on about our tenth date we had sex; there was alcohol involved. Up until then he was really pursuing me, but now he has backed off. We had no date this past weekend and none planned. I’m afraid that I opened up too much and told him I really liked him, and that being in a relationship is scary […]
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Dear Nina: Should I be tolerant when it comes to a girlfriend hanging out with ex lovers? They are not people she dated, but people she has slept with. Recently, she blew me off for a “friend” coming into town, and I found out the “friend” was someone she had a threesome with, and the friend was spending the night at her apartment. She was not upfront or honest about it. She had other recent ex- lovers she wanted to hang out with, too. I broke it off, because I’m not cool with it. I said she should give these […]
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Am I right for him? This is the unconsciously asked question that gets women into big trouble with men. You may not realize it, but you may be operating through this filter in your relationships. Initially, he’s totally into you, and that feels wonderful! But what happens a few weeks or months later when he seems to pull away emotionally? How do you handle it when his attention and intention fall off? How do you react when he begins to subtly (or not-so-subtly) criticize you, making suggestions about how you can lose weight, cut your hair, and more? Listen to […]
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According to the U.S. Census Bureau, married couples now represent 48 percent of all U.S. households. That’s down from 52 percent in the last Census. The reason is twofold: The fast-growing older population is more likely to be divorced or widowed later in life, and 20-somethings are putting off their nuptials for longer stretches. Experts say fears of not keeping a job, a widening labor market for women and a shift away from having kids at a young age are some of the reasons people in their 20s and early 30s are not joining the ranks of married people, at least […]
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Hi Nina: I am attracted to emotionally unavailable men. However I am also emotionally unavailable; I always look for an escape clause. I watched my parents, who loved each other, have a miserable marriage for over 30 yrs (they divorced when I was 26). I swore that if I cared for someone & he or I wasn’t happy I would be strong enough to leave. I was in a relationship with a man for 6 yrs & as usual I left. I believe this was the right thing to do, for both of us. Now when I meet someone I am […]
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When a single dad is dating, how long should he wait before meeting the woman’s children and vice versa? And how should the father describe the relationship with the woman before the kids meet her? It depends. The timing varies depending on the age of the children and the circumstances of the Dad’s single life. Most children fantasize that their divorced parents will reunite. Meeting someone new crushes that hope, and that can be difficult for them. There are no hard and fast rules about the timing of introducing someone new to your children. What’s important is to consider all […]
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Recently a journalist called and wanted to discuss the impact of texting on relationships – not the first time I have been asked that question. It’s highly relevant given the prevalence of social medial and how it’s used. Here are the questions asked and my answers: Do you think that texting creates insecurity and misunderstanding in a relationship? And does it give a man more power? Texting is just a tool, and like any other tool, it can be used constructively or destructively. If you have an issue in your relationship, texting is not the avenue to solve it. Face-to-face interaction is better […]
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