Unrealistic Expectations
By Nina Atwood
Boy meets girl in the midst of spine-tingling adventure. They hate each other at first, then they fall into bed because the chemistry overpowers them. Miraculously, they suddenly love each other. In the course of three days, they have set the stage for a lifelong relationship. Does this sound familiar?
It should, because it’s the back story behind most television and movie “love stories.” We buy it because it’s exciting. Drama sells, so Hollywood continues to push it.
Don’t get me wrong – I’m one of the people sitting there with the popcorn! But at the end of the day, I go home with a real guy, not a Hollywood fantasy, and I couldn’t be happier.
It’s unrealistic to think you’ll meet someone who looks like a movie star, has his (or her) act completely together, and knows exactly what to do to make you happy. It’s unrealistic to envision a near-perfect person with no flaws, someone who will never give you grief, stir up irritation, or let you down.
When you’re writing your Vision Statement (see Be Your Own Dating Service), make sure you’re picturing something real. Focus on the relationship qualities that you want to attract rather than the physical (or near perfect emotional) characteristics of the person. Get real and something real will show up in your life.
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