Relationship Nay-Sayers and How to Deal
By Nina Atwood
Cyndi wonders if she’s all alone in the Big Apple, envisioning herself in a happy relationship with a good guy. Her friends tell her to “have a good time” (i.e., sleep around and live for the moment) while her dates offer up crumbs instead of a banquet (i.e., a threesome instead of committed monogamy). Up against that kind of feedback, it’s easy to understand why Cyndi has to work a bit at keeping her morale and her morals. First, hats off to you, Cyndi! You are adhering to your values and maintaining an optimistic view of life and relationships. Yes, Cyndi, I assure you, there are lots of good men out there and someone with whom you can share a wonderfully joyous life.
So, how do you respond to the cynical, the jaded, the anti-relationship-ers? The answer is: you don’t, unless that person is open to feedback. When someone doesn’t share your values, there’s not much you can say that will track with that person, not unless he/she asks for your point of view and is genuinely interested in what you have to say. Then you can share from your perspective: “I believe in the possibility of love; I believe in attracting a like-minded and like-spirited person who wants what I want; I believe that as long as I keep my belief and faith intact, that will happen. To believe otherwise would be giving up, and I’m unwilling to give up on one of the core life experiences that I wish to attract.”
Adhere to your faith, Cyndi, and your process, and you will be rewarded – of that I have no doubt. Yes, interview those guys, look for core values, and weed them out fast! The sooner you say “next!” when it’s not right, the sooner you will meet someone who is right for you. The universe responds to positive belief and a to a clear vision. Write again when you meet him!
Entry Filed under: Advice for Women,Dating,Relationships
