Women: 10 Mistakes to Avoid on First Dates
By Nina Atwood
Men aren’t the only ones who shoot themselves in the foot on first dates. Women are also vulnerable. The goal on a first date isn’t to win him over or impress him. When a woman focuses on winning a guy over, she takes away his natural urge to pursue. This throws the relationship off balance at the get-go. Instead, a woman’s goal is to be her best self and trust the process to reveal whether or not this date holds the possibility of a good relationship. That said, she must pay attention to behavior that could sabotage her goal. Things NOT to do on a date if you want to be pursued by a great guy:
- Talk negatively about your ex
- Compare the guy in front of you to your ex
- Make him carry the entire conversation by not initiating or by responding in five words or less
- Check your watch frequently (indicates you can’t wait for the date to be over)
- Inquire about his personal wealth
- Dress provocatively (makes it look like you’re all about sex)
- Talk about how little time you have for a relationship
- Talk about how you don’t need a relationship/man
- Tell him that after your last boyfriend who never proposed, you expect a ring in six months or less
- Ask him for the next date
What these things have in common is either a.) too much emotional baggage/neediness or b.) overplaying your independence. Relationships are sparked because you discover common values and interests, so that’s what your conversation should be about. Guys like to pursue, so let him. Guys like to help, and the truth is that life is generally better with a partner, so allow some vulnerability to show. Most of all, though, be yourself and let your real personality shine. Too much orchestration makes for an awkward date, so let it flow.
Entry Filed under: Advice for Women,Dating
