Reading the book a second time!

Excellent book that puts finding a mate/relationship into perspective. I have highlighted throughout the book, and reading it a second time to take notes. The author could not have been more descriptive in her analysis of how to determine what direction (north, east, south or west) the person that you have an interest in is headed. I love this book! It says everything that I've been trying to explain to the girls when we get together to "exhale".
- Amazon customer

Dating for a *committed* relationship

Ok, I have to give my 2 cents on this book. I am almost done (about 10 more pages left), but I want to give my impression while the ideas are fresh in my mind.

First of all, the reason why I like this book is because the targeted audience of this book is geared toward my type of people. I wanted to search for someone that I can share my life with and I'm ready for an exclusive and committed relationship. I really want to know how I can go out and find someone like that will fulfill my needs. If you are someone who wants to know how to date a beautiful model or use the best pick-up lines, then this book isn't for you.

I think the bottom line of this book is easy to understand and it's straightforward. This book tells you "not settle for less." I think it gives several convincing arguments on why we will be better off if we dump someone that isn't making us happy. Furthermore, the author explains the essential ingredient needed for a healthy relationship. I will not spoil the bean, but I ask a lot of my friends and they all agree that those ingredients are needed.

For those of us who is too shy to find a date (a lot of male friend I know is in this situation), this book addresses ways we can expand our chance of finding a date. I think it does a pretty good job of expanding our horizon.

Furthermore, this book addresses the importance of communication. I can't agree more. The author delineates common misconceptions that couples faces after the fireworks wear out.

This book is much more than a dating book. It teaches interpersonal skills as well. I am always seeking ways to grow and I think this book does a great job of giving advice. It is a keeper for me. - Amazon customer

Great Read

I bought this book after a devastating break up; I was looking for some understanding and help to get though this tough time. The problem in my last relationship was communication so the title of this book was important to me... Boy I'm glad that I found and read Nina's book. It helped me realize the mistake I had made along the way and understand that it wasn't entirely "his" fault. Through reading this book, I learned how to be honest with my self and how to be honest with others. I thought long and hard about what I want from a relationship, love and life. I have come to the conclusion that EVERYONE should read this book. Relationships truly are a two way street, and the author really knows how to express that. I think that I'm going to go and buy copies for all my good friends and hope that they will get as much out of this book as I did. - “jlofshult” on Amazon

This book is excellent

This is not just how to meet people, but an excellent book on sorting out your priorities on what you want in a relationship, being upfront with your dates about what you are looking for, and doing this by the third date-- how to build and maintain healthy relationships as the title states. I would highly recommend it!! - Amazon customer

For a healthy relationship choose your partner wisely

The main theme of the book is to provide a method to have choices of who we date and early in the dating process communicate what is the true potential of the relationship to meet your vision of your future life. The goal is to communicate early so both parties can understand one another and build the relationship from there. The book provides insights into talking about what is important such as religion, spirituality, career, children, money and sexual intimacy. The book details talking about feelings for each other, the relationship potential, where we currently stand, issues that need resolving and an agreement to inform each other if feelings change. It is a book that lets both parties be responsible and truthful about making the dating relationship healthy. - Amazon customer

The most thought-out approach to dating yet.

A real game-plan for dating with the idea of finding a lasting relationship, not just another rollercoaster. Progressively getting better from chapter to chapter, it gives substance to the process of getting to know someone. The insights on communication and the actual relationship information was as much or more valuable than building a "date". Atwood's "Date Lines" is the same way, in that the meat of the book is far more powerful than the title indicates. - Amazon customer

It's a philosophy of be your own *.*

This book is great. It is a philosophy of being responsible for your destiny in dating and all of life's relationship. The philosophy is to find out your needs and expectations. Then express this to others who you know so that you have a variety of choices of who to date. This creates security and self-esteem in dating. Then communication through "You and Me Conversations" lets each partner be an equal. This book and the author's website have been a great help to me. - Amazon customer

a very good guide to dating and relationships

i found this book to be very helpful with the beginning of a new relationship. it touches on many things you experience when meeting someone new, how to meet them and how to deal with them. how to determine if you have the same goals as your date, how to set your goals, and what to do when your goals don't match. it discusses the many different personalities one encounters. it runs you through how to break up, and when, as well as how to continue a relationship through proposal. the book is written in a very easy to read manner. - Fastdod@aol.com

Makes more sense than The Rules. Communication is allowed.

Maintaining healthy relationships through communications is the author's main point. Sets good examples of how to develop one's self so that can be interdependent with a dating relationship and in all relationships. Compared to the "playing hard to get game" of the current rage book, The Rules, this book shoes respect for both parties. It's a great book for dating relationships and all relationships, be they business, social or family – Amazon customer

Still so relevant 10 years later

Its amazing how even as years go by, good advice stands true. For a book written in 1996, I was impressed with the sound strategies and the clear eyed self analysis exercises that force you to look within. I would be interested to find out how the author sees online dating as its become so pervasive over the past decade. But this book is well worth the money if you're serious about recharting your path in the dating/relationship world. – Kerri L. Forrest

Good Book

As a man who is in his mid-thirties I am ready to be in a committed relationship. I feel like a lot of the books that are out there are for how to pick up women in thirty seconds and they are somewhat funny but don't help and not what I am after. If you want to read that kind of book look elsewhere. This book provided good advice as far as steps to take to head in the right direction. I bought this with the book "Stumbling Naked in the Dark" upon suggestion of a friend that I work with and they worked well together for me. – Amazon customer

Be True To Yourself

I found this book very interesting, helpful, and an excellent educational tool. I would recommend this book to anyone who is in a dating relationship and also for pregnant teens and others who are entering into the social/dating world following a break-up.

The dialogue is honest, concise, in-depth, and written well. The reader is treated like an intelligent person who can think and make sound judgments when in a dating or other relationship.

I especially liked Part II, The Relationship and the chapters dealing with Attachment, Sex, Love, and Communication. These chapters address and discuss what is needed to talk about before entering into a committed exclusive relationship. I read it last year and reviewed several chapters again in 2002 to keep myself on track.

Regarding any advice on dating and interpersonal relationships, the information should be assimilated and used prudently. Human behavior is, for the most part, unpredictable and to adhere to a set dating plan or to categorize a person as a North/South/East/Westbound Train is unrealistic. But the book defines the user, non-committed, and unavailable people and lists warning signs of the Westbound (not available for a commitment but has a desire to be with you). Dating goals should be based on individual preferences, lifestyle, and needs. - Amazon customer