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Be Your Own Dating Service: A Step-by-Step Guide to Finding and Maintaining Healthy Relationships
By Nina Atwood


  • Where are all the good people to date?
  • Why do I always end up with the wrong person?
  • Why is love so hard to find?

This upbeat and on-target book answers these questions and much more! Ten years after initial publication, Be Your Own Dating Service continues to score a direct hit on the issues singles struggle with the most. Buy it today if you want to date smart, date healthy, and get positive results!


Editorial Reviews

Ms. Atwood's book empowers singles in their journey toward healthy romantic love.

- John Gray, author of Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus

A must-read for singles.

- Pat Love, author of Hot Monogamy

What readers have to say:

It changed my life!
The only thing I didn't like was the title. This book is so much more than how to date. I followed the suggestions to the last detail. I began by looking at previous relationships, what was good and bad about them and what happened. Then I looked at what I wanted in a relationship. I followed suggestions about increasing my network of friends and acquaintances. I paid attention to where I was in the stages of life and where the other people were. There were so many excellent insights into the psychology of relationships and how to match the physical, emotional, intellectual and not settle -- and also why I settled before and how not to. I can't say enough, and after three months I found someone so incredibly right for me I can't believe it, and she feels the same! Thank you so much, Nina Atwood, I'm telling all my single friends about your book!

- Jim Turner, Tucson, AZ

The best
The best book about dating relationships I have found... and it's about much more than just getting dates. As a male psychiatrist at a major university student health service where inability to make good choices in finding a healthy relationship is a common presenting complaint I recommend this book when I feel the patient could benefit from some study concerning the matter. Ordinarily I'm not really a fan of what I consider pop psychology but this book is very insightful and gives a good framework for understanding a process that we are taught very little about but somehow we are supposed to know. The reality for most us is learning in a trial and error fashion, often blindly, without much understanding about why things are going so badly and accumulating baggage along the way. There should be a course on this in high school if education is about preparing people for life, and if so, this book would be on my required reading list.

- Bradley v Williams, USA

Excellent book that puts finding a mate/relationship into perspective. I have highlighted throughout the book, and reading it a second time to take notes. The author could not have been more descriptive in her analysis of how to determine what direction (north, east, south or west) the person that you have an interest in is headed. I love this book! It says everything that I've been trying to explain to the girls when we get together to "exhale".

Ok, I have to give my 2 cents on this book. I am almost done (about 10 more pages left), but I want to give my impression while the ideas are fresh in my mind. First of all, the reason why I like this book is because the targeted audience of this book is my type of people. I wanted to search for someone that I can share my life with and I'm ready for an exclusive and committed relationship. I really want to know how I can go out and find someone like that will fulfill my needs. If you are someone who wants to know how to date a beautiful model or use the best pick-up lines, then this book isn't for you.
I think the bottom line of this book is it’s easy to understand and it's straightforward. This book tells you "not to settle for less." I think it gives several convincing arguments on why we will be better off if we dump someone that isn't making us happy. Furthermore, the author explains the essential ingredients needed for a healthy relationship. I will not spill the beans, but I asked a lot of my friends and they all agree that those ingredients are needed.
For those of us who are too shy to find a date (a lot of male friends I know is in this situation), this book addresses ways we can expand our chance of finding a date. I think it does a pretty good job of expanding our horizon. Furthermore, this book addresses the importance of communication. I can't agree more. The author delineates common misconceptions that couples face after the fireworks wear out.
This book is much more than a dating book. It teaches interpersonal skills as well. I am always seeking ways to grow and I think this book does a great job of giving advice. It is a keeper for me.

I bought this book after a devastating break up; I was looking for some understanding and help to get though this tough time. The problem in my last relationship was communication so the title of this book was important to me... Boy I'm glad that I found and read Nina's book. It helped me realize the mistakes I had made along the way and understand that it wasn't entirely "his" fault. Through reading this book, I learned how to be honest with my self and how to be honest with others. I thought long and hard about what I want from a relationship, love and life. I have come to the conclusion that EVERYONE should read this book. Relationships truly are a two way street, and the author really knows how to express that. I think that I'm going to go and buy copies for all my good friends and hope that they will get as much out of this book as I did.

Finding this book really made me come to my senses where dating is concerned. Instead of just trial and error, I have an idea of what to do and when to do it. This book picks up the pace as it goes along, and has good material for having better relationships in general. "Date Lines" is next!
This book is excellent

This is not just how to meet people, but an excellent book on sorting out your priorities on what you want in a relationship, being upfront with your dates about what you are looking for, and doing this by the third date-- how to build and maintain healthy relationships as the title states. I would highly recommend it!!

I am 22 and for most of my dating life, I've been completely incapable of actively seeking a relationship. I've been reading your book, "Be Your Own Dating Service" and have had results like never before. I'm not sure what it is about your book, but I have felt an ever-increasing level of comfort when seeing, meeting, and developing relationships. I am only half way though this book, but the results so far have been fantastic. I've gone from a half dozen dates in the last three years, to half a dozen in the last week or two. The skills and concepts laid out in your book have been an emotional life saver. It's important to let people know what a help they've been to me, whether I know them or not. So again, thank you!

- Ben



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